the color yellow is more likely to get your attention

have you ever been surfing the web, googling 'can you feed a cow a hamburger without risking mad cow disease?' (you can't by the way), trying to find that one blog that always makes you laugh (looks like you found it), facebooking, or what ever makes the internet so compelling, and then your vision is blinded by a big, horribly colored 'FREE' sign? if you didn't just now then you must be immune to retarded people, colors, and words, something that i've always envied to this day.

anyway, you're sitting there, trying regain you're sight from that free thing, and you don't even know what is free, so you lean towards you're screen to try and read those tiny little words that tell you what is free, and it goes a little like this: 

harmonica

and so you're sitting there, squinting at the screen and you're like 'oh! it's a free harmonica!' and so then you click on it, because, duh, who doesn't want a FREE harmonica? and you fill out some forms and then they're sending it to you and you're sitting there, imagining yourself playing a harmonica, when all the sudden this thing pops up and it's like 'oops! it was only FREE for the first millisecond. you're going to have to pay $423 every hour for the rest of your life!' 

'cause i don't know about you, but that happens about every other day for me.

gasoline was once sold in small bottles as a cure for lice

i've known some people for months and they still call me kate. i guess that would make sense, you know, because we're twins and everything, but, really?

 is there anything about this that merely suggests that we're related?
how does anyone even know we're twins?
maybe it's because every time we meet someone kate always says 'hi, i'm kate and this is my twin sister jane.'
she told me that she does that because of those times where we've known someone for years and all the sudden they're like 'wait, you guys are twins?'
i guess that's annoying one time but what's more annoying is 'hi kate!' hundreds of times.

during his lifetime, artist vincent van gogh only sold one of his paintings.

if i were brave i'd post that awkward video of me dancing to music only i can hear.
if i were smart i'd stop complaining about homework and actually do it.
if i were an artist, i wouldn't be afraid to share my drawings.


just a couple regrets. you know what? forget this.

you might want to put on some music to make it look less awkward.
that last part there was me dropping my i-pod-putting a rather abrupt end to the music.

:)

according to suicide statistics, monday is the favored day for self-destruction.

guess what guys? today i'm going to point out the obvious! yay!
or, you know, obvious to me, i mean, the title to this post seemed pretty obvious to me, but i guess it's new to you simple minded followers. i mean.
yay! i love my followers and all that crap!
um.
i think i have more drafts in my head then on my laptop. i'm just to lazy to get up and write it down, or, most of the time, i can't. i might be falling asleep, doing stupid stuff at school, eating the butt of a pig (i believe you call it bacon.), battling a dragon, or the like.

it'd be cool if there was some app that puts the stuff you think about on a draft for you. but if i post everything that comes out of my mind unfiltered, you guys would probably be all like 'oh my heck this is to awesome for me to comprehend!' and then you might stop following my blogs because it's so intimating that you can't handle it, and then that'd make me sad because i have so few official followers in the first place.

but don't worry, i understand your insistence to not do something as to click that foul 'join this sight' button on the right of this post. 

don't worry, don't worry, i'm not holding any grudges (if you heard me read this post out loud, you'd hear that sentence dripping in sarcasm.)

i think i'll throw in a picture right here, just because i feel that posts without pictures are pretty boring, i mean, deep inside we all wish it was still appropriate to read picture books. 

i didn't really have anything to take a picture of, but that was on my desk so i just took a picture of it. i'm sure a good part of you are like 'eww jane, that's math crap what happened to your witty posts about hating math?!' well i thought of that and i have a reasonable answer for it. when you saw that ^ i saw this:

if you guys recognize this piece of humor, you are worthy of eating a muffin. if not, i'm going to have to direct you here because i get a good part of my ideas come from allie brosh, however i have to warn you that she swears like a sailor and you might break your gut from laughing to hard. if you don't like swearing or gut breaking, i suggest you keep reading my blog.

Happy people generally earn more than unhappy people.

so i found this website that tells you the kind of person you are based on you're drawing or handwriting. 
this is what i drew.

it doesn't look as good as it would if i was really drawing, in which case it would look like this:

it's hard to draw with a laptop mouse. anyway, here's the link.
in case you didn't click on the link or you never learned how to read (which wouldn't make much sense if you're reading this right now.), this is what it says about me:

You think you are very intelligent.You are sometimes a shy person.You frequently get anxious and have antisocial tendencies.You are a needy person.

wow. um. you got that from my clearly happy face?

this website totally slammed on me.

ouch.

the color red can make your heart beat faster.

it's christmas.
i believe this calls for a kick-butt awesome post.
i had a pretty tight christmas. if you don't believe me, check out this convincing photo i will attach (here):

what makes it convincing is the crappy photo that i didn't edit whatsoever, just because it's already so awesome. 
panda hat.
skullcandy headphones.
and yes. an i-pod.
i guess this post isn't as kick-butt awesome as i wanted it to be, but my daddy called me down for bacon, and i'm sure that if you where in my position, you'd add a crappy ending and fall down the stairs just like i'm about to do.

the word "nerd" was first coined by dr. seuss

do you care about what i do in my life?

i mean, when i read other blogs they'd be like 'oh my heck i just battled a bunch of monkey squirrels with james roday and johnny depp it was so hot!!!!!!!(lots of explanation points)!!!!!!!'

because, if you really wanted to know what i do all day i guess i could tell you, but it be dang boring.

like, all you'd see is 'all i did today was stab cap'n crunch in the face a couple times, then drowned him just because he was freaking me out.'

boring right?

((((oh my heck he looks like a zombie thing gross...))))

the u.s. printed more than 172,000 new book titles in 2006.

things that annoy me.

1. having an awesome dream and not being able to remember it.
2. brushing my hair after a long, sleepless night.
3. 'can you babysit?' 'sure when?' 'oh, i'm driving over there right now.' O.o
4. people that read over my shoulder (you don't know it but i just slammed my sister).
5. mondays.
6. dentists that think it's my fault that my gums are bleeding.
7. crappy endings to good books.
8. bad breath (that was another slam, she's brushing her teeth right now)
9. trying to look all cool when you take out you're phone, but then dropping it.
10. people that get angry at me for something they did.
11. those kids who think they know it all.
12. when people whine.
13. people who eat with there mouths open. it's gross.
14. not knowing how to end a post.

flamingos are pink because of the food they eat

sometimes i feel like i have to do awesome posts involving an epic battle between walruses and flamingos on the moon. but the thing is, those kind of posts are hard to start, so i spend, like, 6 minutes trying to figure it out, but i end up just giving up.

i know you really want to see that walrus.

so, here you go. 

i love how walruses closely resemble half the history teachers at my school, even the women.

oh yeah, and here's your flamingo too.

how can you not like flamingos? okay, i don't know anyone who looks like flamingos, but i know plenty of people with those little eyes that pierce through your soul.

and here's the moon too.

sorry the pictures aren't together, but you can not imagine the crap i get every time i google 'walrus fighting flamingo on the moon'. apparently that's never happened before. i guess i could add that to my bucket list. it looks like i need to sneeze while i'm up there too. 

so i guess we're done here.

jesus christ was really born in april

**it's christmas!!** 
i love christmas. the lights, the gifts, the pictures, the cards, the clothes, and family. 
it just puts me in a good mood. 
so, what do you like best, giving or getting?
it's. to. hard.
i like giving because it's just really great to see the look on people's faces when i give them stuff. i like choosing what to give for people.
i is going to help you!!
i know it's hard to give stuffs, so i'll give you some tips:

• shop early. you can't be sure when the next time you get money ((unless, you know, you have a job or something)), so it's a good idea to pick something up for others.
• listen. some people have a thing called wish-lists. trust me, they know what they want.
• pay a little more attention. you don't have to stalk anyone, just pay attention to what they do with there free time and give them something to have to do with that.
• don't let them see price tags. i get it, not a lot of people care, but it's a safe thing to do.

i hope that helps. and remember to have fun shopping.

ancient egyptains shaved off their eyebrows to mourn the deaths of their cats

hey guys.
i'm in a really good mood. 
so. this was fun. enjoy my little survey:

TEN HOW'S:

How did you get one of your scars?

...i slipped on mud...

How did you celebrate your last birthday?

i had a few of my friends come over.

How are you feeling at this moment?

i'm feeling happyful!!

How did your night go last night?

it was really great!! we went caroling!!

How did you do in high school?

you tell me.

How did you get the shirt you're wearing?

my closet.

How often do you see your best friend?

i don't really play favorites, but i see my friends every day at school or young womens.

How much money did you spend last month?

i'm not sure....i did a bit of christmas shopping.

How old do you want to be when you get married?

around my mid-twenties.

How old will you be at your next birthday?

15 years in counting.

NINE WHAT'S:

Your mothers name?

Laurie.

What did you do last weekend?

i was chucking apples to apples cards at my friends....it was a pretty crazy night.

What would you rather be doing?

i'd rather be riding on a giraffe's back in the middle of ohio.

What did you last cry over?

hmm.... i'm not sure.... i think i was praying.

What always makes you feel better when you’re upset?

music, books, i wrote about it here.

What’s the most important thing you look for in a significant other?

it's important to be an active member of the church.

What are you worried about?

ugh....my math teacher told me that i should join study skills next year. i'm not that bad am i?

What did you have for breakfast?

i had knock-off rice crispys. 

EIGHT HAVE YOU’S:

Have you ever liked someone who had a girlfriend/boyfriend?

yep:)

Have you ever had your heart broken?

not at this age.

Have you ever been out of the country?

no sir.

Have you ever done something outrageously dumb?

everyday....but that's just me:)

Have you ever been back stabbed by a friend?

um? i don't get it. i have never been stabbed.

Have you ever dated someone younger than you?

ask me again in a few years.

SEVEN WHO’S:

Who was the last friend you saw?

ally. we have foods together.

Who was the last person you IM/texted?

my mum(:

Who was the last person you hungout with?

my twin sissy kate

Who was the last person to call you?

some guy who had the wrong number.

Who did you last hug?

my mama.

Who is the last person who texted you?

my mum

Who was the last person you said "i love you" to?

my mother.

SIX WHERE’S:

Where does your best friend live?

most of my friends live around here.

Where did you last go?

school:p

Where did you last hang out?

.......^^^^

Where do you go to school?

hogwarts, silly!!

Where is your favorite place to be?

my bedroom:)

FIVE DO’S/DOES:

Do you like someone right now?

oh yes:)

Do you think anyone likes you?

....i'm not really sure.

Do you ever wish you were someone else?

*gasp* no. i like me a lot.

Do you know the muffin man?

oh yeah we're tight.

Does the future scare you?

uh....no.

FOUR WHY’S:

Why are you best friends with your best friend(s)?

'cause, you know, guh..... i haven't the slightest idea.

Why did you get a Facebook?

i'm not really sure....

Why did your parents give you the name you have?

my mom likes the sound of it. i wasn't really named after anyone.

Why are you doing this survey?

i just felt like writing today.

THREE IF’S:

If you could have one super power what would it be?

time travel and transportation baby!!

If you could go back in time and change one thing, would you?

well time travel wouldn't be very fun if i didn't now would it? 

If you were stranded on a deserted island & could bring 1 thing what would you bring?

please. no stranded on island questions.

TWO WOULD-YOU-EVER’S:

Would you ever get back together with any of your ex’s if they asked you?

i don't have ex's

Would you ever move to run away from a problem?

that would be one expensive problem.

ONE LAST QUESTION

Are you happy with your life right now?

yes i am!!

but hey, you guys should post this on your blogs, i'd enjoy reading your answers:)

'ukulele' translates as 'jumping flea'

sometimes, i feel sad inside. but that's okay. because i know how to deal with it.
when i'm sad, i read.
it helps to read about people with bigger problems.

these are just a few of my favorites.

of course, i also chill out and listen to music.

music just makes me so happy. i love singing along, loud and off key, because it scares off that sad feeling every time.

 these are also a few favorites.

although queen is my all time favorite band. ever.

so, what makes you happy?

shakespeare coined the phrase 'knock knock, who's there?'

click here

i really like these. they're pretty tight. you can do it with any wrapper and stuffs.
i think i'll try this later.